Why This 15-Pound Weighted Blanket Is Part of My Anti-Anxiety Routine

My anxiety causes a lot of sleeping problems. I set out to see if a gravity blanket would help me get a more peaceful night’s sleep.

Health and wellness touch each of us differently. This is one person’s story.

“You’ll never believe what happened last night,” I told my husband many years ago. “I went to bed and didn’t wake up until 8 a.m.”

“You mean you slept like a normal person?” he joked.

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“That’s normal?”

Most people go to bed and wake up eight hours later? I wondered. I typically wake up around 10 times a night — more than once an hour.

It’s common for middle-aged and older adults to wake up two or three times a night. But Fitbit found that their users wake up over nine times a night on average, which could be indicative of America’s sleep problems.

Ever since realizing that waking up 10 times a night isn’t normal — or healthy — I’ve been on a journey to become a better sleeper.

My difficulty sleeping stems from having generalized anxiety disorder (GAD).

There’s a lot of scientific evidence showing that anxiety and sleep are closely connected. I often sleep better on days when my anxiety is at bay. When I’m ruminating on something, or several things, I tend to wake up more often or it takes longer to get back to sleep.

Sleep problems can also cause anxiety, too. For me, a bad night’s sleep exacerbates my anxiety.

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Fixing my sleep problems isn’t only important for myself, but also for my marriage. Because I’m a restless sleeper and my husband constantly moves at night, we often have difficulty sharing our queen-size bed.

I’ve tried everything in the book to get more restful sleep: a white noise machine, Xanax, earplugs, and therapy. The white noise machine occasionally rattles and is difficult to travel with. The Xanax leaves me feeling groggy when I wake up the next day. The earplugs are uncomfortable. Therapy has helped me manage my anxiety, but it serves as more of a long-term strategy than a daily tool.

A month ago, I realized there was one thing I hadn’t tried yet: a weighted gravity blanket. I read about their magical ability to calm anxious people so that they’re able to get a deep, restful night’s sleep.

Would this finally be the cure to my sleep problems?

The science supporting gravity blankets

Weighted blankets create deep pressure touch, which is thought to help calm the nervous system of people in states of sensory arousal. This is the theory behind why some children with autism may respond to the use of weighted blankets or vests during moments of sensory overload.

The calming benefits of weighted blankets are supported by some research, too. One small study tested the effectiveness of weighted blankets in adults in 2006. The results were staggering: 63 percent reported lower anxiety after use, and 78 percent found the weighted blanket an effective calming mechanism.

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Another study concluded that weighted blankets led to a calmer night’s sleep for people with insomnia.

However, the small size of these studies and the nature of their design has some sleep experts calling for more studies to scientifically validate claims that gravity blankets can help with anxiety and sleep.

Ready for the weight. But how much?

According to the weighted blanket company, Mosaic, people should choose a blanket that’s about 10 percent (or slightly more) of their body weight. But gravity blankets more commonly come in a handful of specific weights: 10 pounds, 12 pounds, 15 pounds, and 20 pounds, among others.

For example, a 12-pound weighted blanket may be ideal for someone who weighs 120 pounds, a 15-pound one for someone who weighs 150 pounds, and a 20-pound one for someone who weighs 200 pounds.

I weigh 135 pounds, so I opted for this 15-pound weighted blanket that was 4 feet wide by 6 feet long, since I’m 5’7”. (They sell longer options for taller people.)

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I also discovered that these blankets are quite expensive, and the price only increases with the weight of the blanket. Most 15-pound blankets I saw online — including mine — were around $120.

How to buy the right gravity blanket for you

• Weight: Approximately 10 percent of your body weight. If you’re between two sizes, try the heavier weight.
• Size: As large or slightly larger than you. That way, if you toss and turn, you’ll still be under the blanket.
• Price: $100-$249 based on weight, size, and brand (Gravity and BlanQuil are popular).
• Where to buy: Gravity, BlanQuil, and YnM are all available on Amazon.

Getting used to sleeping with the weighted blanket wasn’t easy

My husband picked up the package from our apartment’s leasing office and called me. “What in the world did you order from Amazon? This package weighs a ton!”

Once he dropped it off, I eagerly unwrapped the package to find my light grey, quilted blanket.

Though the blanket was only 15 pounds, it felt insanely heavy the first time I took it out of the box. I could barely lift it.

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Though my puny biceps can’t lift much weight, I can definitely lift 15 pounds in a more compact form. The distribution of weight makes the blanket very difficult to carry unless it’s rolled into a ball.

On the first night of my experiment, I laid down in bed and struggled to arrange the blanket on top of me because it was so heavy.

I ended up asking my husband to position the blanket so that everything from my neck to my toes was covered.

He then put my favorite floral comforter on top of the weighted blanket, as it wasn’t wide enough to cover my typical sprawling, starfish-esque sleeping position.

I was initially worried I would get overheated under the weight of the blanket, but I didn’t at all. Despite its weight, the blanket I purchased was surprisingly cool and breathable.

The first few nights I used the weighted blanket, I woke up to find it crumpled on the ground next to me.

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I tend to avoid wearing or sleeping in anything that feels constricting — a crew cut shirt or a turtleneck would never make its way into my wardrobe. The weighted blanket initially felt cumbersome and confining. I had trouble adjusting and worried I had another failed sleep solution to add to my list.

And then, a few days into my experiment, I had a very anxious day. A million freelance writing deadlines were looming and my husband and I were in the midst of purchasing our first home.

Worried thoughts endlessly rolled through my mind and I had trouble catching my breath. I knew a rough night of sleep was ahead of me.

I had significant work to get done the following day, so Xanax was out of the question.

I cozied up under my weighted blanket and was surprised when, eight hours later, I woke up still beneath it. I had tossed and turned a handful of times throughout the night, but never kicked the blanket completely off of me.

I woke up feeling well-rested and calm. My neck wasn’t as tight as normal. The thoughts looming in my mind before bed had vanished and seemed insignificant in the light of day.

Eight hours of sleep — and feeling cuddled

Over the next two weeks, I slept with the weighted blanket each night, and woke up beneath it each morning. I began to feel a beautiful sense of calm when I’d cozy up underneath it before bed.

I enjoyed the feeling so much I even began using the blanket when reading before bed or surfing the internet on the couch.

Simply having it rested against me from the waist down was soothing in a way I hadn’t ever experienced.

I found the blanket particularly beneficial on the nights when my husband worked overnight and I was home alone.

Cuddling with him in silence before bed for 10 or 20 minutes each night always soothes my anxiety. When he couldn’t be there, the weighted blanket was a happy substitute. It made me feel as safe and secure as I could without him actually being there.

Though my husband and I still struggled to share our bed during the two-week experiment, we had more successful days than normal. Because I was so tightly enveloped, I could hardly feel him moving beside me.

After my experiment, I asked my husband who’s a doctor, what he thought the medical explanation was for why weighted blankets helped people not only with anxiety, but ADHD and autism, too. “I think it’s because your whole body is being cuddled,” he joked.

I’ve used the weighted blanket on and off for the past month and can confidently say it’s a routine I’ll maintain.

It’s not the magical cure for my sleep problems. But it’s surprisingly effective at helping me achieve deeper sleep, especially when used in conjunction with my white noise machine.

Though I still wake up multiple times a night, I’m at 4 or 5 instead of 10.

8 Reasons Your Friends (and Twitter) Should Never Replace Therapy

Your friends and family might love you, but they don’t always make for good therapists.

Approximately 1 in 6 adults in the United States experiences mental health issues in any given year, according to the National Institute of Mental Health. Luckily, among those 44 million Americans are celebrities who are using their platform to raise awareness and normalize talking about mental health issues.

That includes Kanye West.

“I want to change the stigma of [the word] crazy, of mental health — period,” he told radio personality Charlamagne in a nearly two-hour long interview earlier this month.

Unfortunately, Kanye went on to make some polarizing comments about therapy: “I use the world as my therapy, as my therapist,” he said. “I will pull them into the conversation of what I’m feeling at that point and get their perspective.”

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Twitter didn’t react so kindly to Kanye’s comments, some going so far as to call this strategy dangerous.

After all, friends and family aren’t always the best source of advice. Plus, there are many benefits of talking to a therapist that you simply won’t get from a non-professional.

We’ve certainly come a long way when it comes to destigmatizing the world of mental health.

Today, younger generations are viewing therapy as a crucial part of proactively maintaining their overall wellness, says licensed psychologist Erika Martinez, PsyD. “Because of our prevalent medical model and the way insurance is set up, mental health has been thought of as secondary or tertiary care. It’s never been used as preventive medicine. Now, prevention is what it’s all about.”

But there’s still an undeniable stigma around talking about mental health and seeing a therapist.

Maybe you feel embarrassed to require help beyond what friends or family can provide, or maybe you — like Kanye — just have yet to understand the benefits of paying to talk to someone.

These eight reasons to talk to a therapist, rather than friends and family, may change your mind:

1. A therapist won’t judge you

One of the biggest perks of having a therapist? You can talk to them about literally anything without needing to filter yourself for fear of being judged. It’s basically one of the key requirements of the job.

“My job is to give you 100 percent positive regard and unconditional support, and to be completely nonjudgmental,” Kate Cummins, licensed clinical psychologist, tells Healthline.

Friends and family might not have the extensive training to keep their judgement in check on whatever you’re going through.

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2. Therapists aren’t pushing their own agenda

As an unbiased third party, your therapist should be there to give the best possible guidance to you — and you alone. “The problem with friends is that they care about you and their relationship with you, so they often just agree with you to make you feel better,” says psychiatrist Scott Carroll, MD.

“Family, on the other hand, tends to advise you in ways to ‘protect you’ and minimize your risk, or [to] fit their beliefs about morals and how they think life should be lived,” he says.

These are the best-case scenarios. The worst case is that your friend or family member may actually want to control you or keep you in a pathological state for their benefit, he adds.

With a therapist, you have someone who doesn’t have the same personal stake, so they can be completely honest and objective.

3. They’re required to keep your secrets

When you choose to make your friends your therapists, you can end up putting both of you in a tough spot. Especially if you’re venting about someone they also have a relationship with, says Martinez.

While it’s important to only confide in those who you have complete trust in, with a therapist, you don’t have to worry that something you said in confidence will be turned into gossip or repeated to the wrong person.

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4. Therapists have years of training under their belt to help you address the problem

While your friend may have taken a Psych 101 class, without a degree, they simply don’t have the tools to help you take action. (And even if they did, they’d have bias). “Your friends and family can listen and provide support, but a clinician is trained to understand your psychological behaviors. They can help you uncover the why,” Cummins says.

And most importantly, they can also give you healthy coping strategies, so you can change your behaviors, or move past dysfunctional thoughts or difficult emotions, she adds.

5. With a therapist, you don’t have to feel guilty about feeling “needy”

After all, you’re paying them (or insurance is)! Any relationship can turn toxic if one person feels like they’re constantly being “used” for support, but never supported in return. With a therapist, it’s not supposed to be a two-way street.

“As a therapist, you don’t expect anything back from your clients, except for them to just show up. With any other relationship you have in life, something is needed in return. If it’s your parents, they need you to be their child; if it’s a friend, they want that friendship back,” says Cummins.

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6. They won’t minimize your problems

There’s nothing worse than going through a painful or traumatic experience and being told by a friend or family member that you should be “over it by now.”

The fact is, everyone experiences and manages life events differently. A therapist will understand that everyone is on their own timeline when it comes to getting over a breakup, settling into a new job, or processing any other obstacle, Cummins says.

And when it comes to other serious mental health issues like depression or anxiety — or even sub-clinical issues like loneliness or social anxiety — a therapist will never minimize or brush over your issues as not serious enough or worthy of attention like your friends or family may.

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7. Talking to the wrong people might make you feel worse

“Some people have really difficult families. It may not be safe to share intimate struggles with them even if they are flesh and blood,” Martinez points out. “Others simply aren’t equipped with the ability to hear your story, and they won’t be able to empathize,” she says.

“When people share intimate struggles with those who haven’t earned the right to hear them, or who make them feel minimized, judged, or deprecated, it can do more damage than good,” she adds.

Of course, talking to select friends and family who do make you feel understood and validated can be helpful, especially if you just need a vent sesh about life stressors, says Carroll. “The irony is that you often have to go to therapy to figure out which of your friends and family are the best to talk to.”

8. They can help you grow as a person

Because of their training, a therapist is uniquely equipped to give you insight into your behaviors that can help you grow in ways that might be impossible on your own.

“For example, in the instance of a breakup, most people think talking to a therapist would be an overreaction. It’s not. It’s one of the healthiest things you can do,” says Martinez. “A breakup is fertile ground for personal growth. Yes, you are emotionally raw and vulnerable, but there’s so much potential there. It’s a chance for people to realize things about themselves they never would’ve realized had they simply talked to friends and family.”

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How to find the right therapist for you

Shopping for a therapist can be a time consuming process. Still, it’s worth it when you find someone who supports and empowers you.

1. Ask your primary care doctor, and — if you’re comfortable sharing — friends, for referrals. You choose your doctors and friends, so chances are you’ll also get along with someone they click with.
2. Look up a list of in-network practitioners on your insurance company website. Every insurance plan includes mental health coverage and it should be the same or a similar co-pay as your other doctors’ appointments.
3. Search thepsychologytoday.com database. It lets you filter by:
   a. specialty or need, like ‘relationships,’ ‘anxiety,’ or ‘body image’
   b. type of provider, such as psychologist, licensed clinical social worker, marriage and family therapist
   c. whether or not they take your insurance
4. Ask these questions if your top choice isn’t covered. If you don’t have insurance, or want to see someone who’s out-of-network or doesn’t accept insurance at all, ask if they offer discounted cash rates. Some therapists also offer a sliding scale to help those who are limited financially.
5. Check out their websites and request a phone call. Once you’ve narrowed down your list to those who meet your needs, read through their bios to get a feel for their personality, then request a preliminary call. Most will offer a free, 15-minute phone consultation. If they won’t talk on the phone, move onto the next person on your list.
6. Ask yourself whether this is someone you feel warm when talking to. If you don’t feel a connection, it’s okay. Move on to the next.
7. Consider online therapy. You can also check out digital therapy apps like Talkspace or BetterHelp, that match you with a licensed counselor whenever you need for a flat monthly rate.

When you do find a therapist, here are some questions to ask them to see if they’re right for you. Remember, it’s your therapy. You can choose the therapist that’s right for you.

Try This: 3 Pushup Variations That Work Your Biceps

What you can do

A standard pushup targets your pectorals (chest muscles), deltoids, and triceps.

But if you engage your core and activate your glutes, this dynamic move can enhance more than just your upper body.

You can even adjust your technique to target your biceps. Here are three biceps-focused variations to try, alternative biceps-busting moves, and more.

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How to do a pushup

To perform a standard pushup, get into a plank position.

Place your palms on the floor. Ensure they’re stacked directly underneath your shoulders. Keep your neck neutral, back straight, core tight, and feet together.

To go down, gently bend your elbows — they should flare out at a 45-degree angle — and slowly lower your body to the floor. Make sure you maintain a straight torso and neutral neck.

When your chest reaches the floor, push yourself back up to start through your arms. Pay special attention to your lower back. You don’t want it to sag toward the floor.

Proper form is key to increasing strength and preventing injury.

Positioning your palms and elbows too far apart can result in shoulder pain. And if your lower back sags when you try to rise, it may cause back pain.

If standard pushups are painful or uncomfortable, don’t force it. Certain modifications can help relieve the pressure on your joints and allow you to safely build your strength.

You may find it helpful to practice with your knees on the ground instead of being in a full-body plank. You could also try performing pushups off of an elevated surface, like a bench or step.

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How to target your biceps

The biceps brachii muscle — known simply as the biceps muscle (yes, it’s always plural!) — is the muscle on the front of your upper arm.

Its main function is to bend your forearm toward your upper arm. It also aids in turning your palm up and down.

Although a standard pushup doesn’t target the biceps muscle, changing the position of your hands can make this muscle play a larger role in the movement.

1. Close-stance pushup

Moving your hands closer together allows you to target your biceps more directly.

To get moving:

1. Get into the standard pushup position, ensuring your torso is stiff and your neck is neutral.
2. Move your hands closer together, leaving just a few inches between them. The closer they are, the harder this exercise will be to perform, so adjust accordingly.
3. Lower your body to the ground, allowing your elbows to flare out at a 45-degree angle.
4. Push back to start and repeat, doing as many reps as you can — or working until “failure” — for three sets.

2. Inside pushup with reversed hands

Moving the alignment of your hands down your torso and reversing their position will produce more of an arm-curling motion. This is key to targeting the biceps.

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This is an advanced move, so consider starting on your knees instead of in a full-body plank.

To get moving:

1. Start in the standard pushup position.
2. Turn your hands so your fingers are facing the wall behind you. Move your hands so they’re aligned with your mid-back.
3. Lower down, tucking your elbows in toward your body as much as possible.
4. Once your chest reaches near the floor, push back up to start. Again, complete three sets to failure.

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3. One-armed pushup

Self-explanatory in its name, a one-armed pushup is done with one arm tucked behind your back.

This is another advanced move, so consider dropping to your knees or performing on an elevated surface to start.

To get moving:

1. Start in the standard pushup position.
2. Widen the distance between your feet to create more stability, then pick one hand up off the ground and place it behind your back.
3. Lower down until your chest nears the floor.
4. Push back up to the start, completing three sets to failure.

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Things to consider

Don’t be discouraged if these exercises are difficult at the outset. Most are for advanced exercisers. Utilize modifications to reap the benefits.

Performing one of these moves at least once a week will help your biceps grow in size and strength — especially if done in combination with a few of the biceps-focused exercises below!

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Other biceps-focused exercises

You can give your biceps a workout with lots of other exercises, too. Try:

Alternating dumbbell biceps curl. If you’re just starting out, stick to 10 pounds or less in each hand. Your torso should remain stationary and your elbows should stay close to your body as you complete the curl.

Barbell biceps curl. You should be able to lift a bit more weight in barbell form, so feel free to go a bit heavier. Make sure your form is solid, though! You want to stay slow and controlled throughout the movement.

Overhead cable curl. You’ll need access to a cable machine for this move, which you perform above your head.

Chinup. Although pullups mainly work your back, switching your grip to perform a chinup will hit those biceps hard. If you have access to a gym, consider using an assisted pullup machine. You can also utilize a band and pullup bar.

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The bottom line

Pushups are a fundamental exercise, one you should incorporate into your exercise routine for functional strength. Doing variations of them — to hit the biceps, for instance — will spice things up and target different muscles.

Baby Acne or Rash? 5 Types and How to Treat Them

Even adults can find it difficult to identify their skin issues. Everyone’s skin is different, and the way rashes and acne flare up can vary. Babies can’t tell you what they’re feeling, so you’ll have to go on looks alone.

Read on to learn about some of the most common skin issues that babies face, and how you can treat them at home.

Pictures of baby acne

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Baby acne

Baby acne usually develops about two to four weeks after birth. Tiny red or white bumps appear on the baby’s cheeks, nose, and forehead. The cause is unknown. It typically clears up on its own in about three to four months without leaving marks.

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To treat baby acne, don’t use any of the over-the-counter acne products you’d use on yourself. These can damage your baby’s delicate skin.

Regular home care should be enough to treat baby acne:

• Wash your baby’s face daily with a gentle soap.
• Don’t scrub hard or pinch the irritated areas.
• Avoid lotions or oily face products.

If you’re concerned that your baby’s acne isn’t going away, their doctor can recommend or prescribe safe treatments.

Eczema

Eczema is a skin condition that causes a dry, red, itchy, and sometimes painful rash. It’s more common in children and often develops in the first 6 months of life. The condition can continue as the child gets older, or they may grow out of it.

In babies up to 6 months old, eczema often appears on the cheeks or forehead. As the baby gets older, the rash may move to the elbows, knees, and skin creases.

Eczema flares up when the skin is dry or when the skin comes into contact with an allergen or irritant, such as:

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• pet dander
• dust mites
• detergent
• household cleaner

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Drooling can also irritate eczema around the chin or mouth.

There’s no cure for eczema, but there are ways to manage your baby’s symptoms:

• Give short, lukewarm baths (between 5 and 10 minutes) and use gentle soap.
• Use a thick cream or ointment as a moisturizer twice a day.
• Use fragrance-free laundry detergent designed for sensitive skin.

Your baby’s pediatrician may be able to prescribe a steroid ointment to help reduce inflammation. Use this as directed by their doctor.BID06_ICD_Aug 2016_ThumbA.mp4

Milia

Milia are tiny white bumps on a newborn’s nose, chin, or cheeks that look similar to acne. They can also appear on the baby’s arms and legs. The bumps are caused by dead skin flakes becoming trapped near the skin’s surface. Like baby acne, milia go away without treatment.

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However, you can use the same at-home care:

• Wash your baby’s face daily with a gentle soap.
• Don’t scrub hard or pinch the irritated areas.
• Avoid lotions or oily face products.

Cradle cap

Cradle cap looks like scaly, yellowish, crusty patches on the baby’s head. This usually develops when a baby is 2 or 3 months old. There may also be redness surrounding the patches. This rash can appear on the baby’s neck, ears, or armpits as well.

While it doesn’t look pretty, cradle cap isn’t harmful to your baby. It’s not itchy like eczema. It’ll go away on its own in a few weeks or months without treatment.

Some things you can do at home to control cradle cap are:

• Wash your baby’s hair and scalp with a gentle shampoo.
• Brush scales out with a soft-bristled hairbrush.
• Avoid washing hair too often, as it’ll dry out the scalp.
• Use baby oil to soften the scales so they’re easier to brush out.

Heat rash

Heat rash is caused when sweat gets trapped under the skin because of blocked pores. It’s usually caused by exposure to hot or humid weather. When a baby gets heat rash, they develop tiny, red, fluid-filled blisters. These can appear on the:

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• neck
• shoulders
• chest
• armpits
• elbow creases
• groin

The rash generally goes away within a few days without treatment. However, see your baby’s doctor if they get a fever or the rash:

• doesn’t go away
• looks worse
• gets infected

To avoid overheating, dress your baby in loose-fitting cotton clothing during hot summer months. Take off extra layers if they get too hot in cooler weather.

Mongolian spots

Mongolian spots are a type of birthmark that appear shortly after birth. The spots can range in size and have a bluish gray color that ranges in darkness. They can be found anywhere on a baby’s body, but are usually seen on the buttocks, lower back, or back of the shoulder.

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The spots are also most common in babies with African, Middle Eastern, Mediterranean, or Asian descent. They’re harmless and fade over time without treatment.

Outlook

These skin conditions are generally harmless and usually go away on their own with little or no treatment. You can help your baby avoid irritating the area by keeping their nails short and putting soft cotton gloves on them at night.

If you’re concerned or feel that your child is dealing with something more serious, talk to their pediatrician.